I’m going to let you in on a secret. If someone wants to do something, they’ll do it. If you feel like you’re constantly there for someone 100% and they can’t even give you 50% it’s not you, it’s them.
I feel like the best thing to base a relationship, any relationship, off of, is “would that person do that for me?” Sort of a test of loyalty, I guess. I have friends that I see occasionally, and I love them. I have friends of friends. If I see them, that’s fine and if I don’t, that’s okay too. Then I have people in my life who have proven time and time again that they would be there for me in a heartbeat and vise versa.
Seeing if someone would do something for you kind of sounds selfish and I don’t care. You have to be selfish; you have to watch out for yourself. I was fortunate enough where I always felt like I had someone in my corner, but there were times where I was constantly doing things for everyone else and getting nothing in return. Sometimes you don’t even realize you’re doing it, you just love the idea of someone or something so much and you put everything you have into it. But any type of relationship should be 50-50. You should never feel like you’re putting in more “work” than the other person. I’ve been there, and that turns into resentment and bitterness. (These are not cute/good personality traits to have. Did I have to type that out? I felt like that needed to be typed out…)
Relationships are work. Friendships are work. But these things should add more happiness into your life than anything else. You won’t love every single thing about every single person, but you learn how people are and what makes them so beautiful that you couldn’t live without them even if you tried.
I have a handful of people like this. You know who you are and I don’t deserve ya.